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Surface Depth

Lately, I've felt a bit of a backlash (not personally understand, just a general sense from reading too many blogs/websites) against "twee" or rather sweet dressing. Sometimes aesthetics are just aesthetics and not a reflection of values or intelligence. Choosing to dress doll-like in no way negates your ability to think or function on a normal/higher level. People seem to think that a peter pan collar indicates a lack of depth in an individual. However, while our exterior can be used to express ourselves, choosing bows and headbands doesn’t mean abdicating from being treated like an adult or acting with maturity. Resembling a 50s housewife in vintage dresses doesn't mean I wish to escape to that bygone era or become a homemaker in the future. It is just as likely that we choose pretty packaging to soften the bite of a sarcastic tongue…

Outfit details:
Gryphon trench coat
vintage dress
Tabio tights

48 comments:

Lela said...

I loved what you said, so true! That dress is ah-mazing!! :)

Andie Bottrell said...

Right on, girl. And I love this gorgeous blue dress you're "packaging" yourself in here. Love!

meowsk said...

Agreed 100%! Not to mention dresses are far more comfortable than pants any day.

Vicki said...

well said my dear!!! love the 'doll like' dress :) x

Marie @ Lemondrop Vintage said...

Lovely, thoughtful post. Sweet is the last thing that comes to mind as an adjective I would use to describe myself but I love designs with sweet elements all the same.

Marie @ Lemondrop ViNtAge

Joanna said...

Agreed, I dislike it when people judge me by my exterior. Like the fact that I love a floral dress means I lack in intelligence of the self-confidence to stand true to myself.

ModaMama.blogspot.com

Sarah Dee said...

I agree! I'm going to school to be a nurse and I wear 50s dresses & peter pan collars a midst a sea of sweatpants and too much seriousness. I just wish people could see that being intelligent doesn't have to be so serious and that they are allowed to have fun with their wardrobes!


<3 Sarah
theantiquepearl.blogspot.com

june said...

That dress is so nice, aesthetically perfect!
Ciao

Ashe said...

I always wish people would just leave our style out and judge us based on our actions-- not our collars!

Frankly, I feel like you've always managed to add a little edge to your outfits, like "I'm sweet, but there's a sharp tongue under here."

Anleah said...

Hmm, sadly whatever you do there will be some judgmental person with a need to trash something. I used to be a tomboy but ever since I discovered blogs and so many amazing styles I find myself in dresses and skirts more and more, and that didn't hurt my intelligence or attitude at all, quite the contrary!
And I just wanna say that I love your blog ever so much, it was the first I've ever discovered and you've been an inspiration for me since (shy smile)

kittenhood said...

my mom told me that people don't take me serious because I dress like a child at 26... it was pretty sad to hear. sometimes I worry about it, sometimes I don't care.
you look lovely btw.

Tempest said...

People are silly and will always make assumptions based on looks/attire. People still seem surprised that I am a nice, intelligent person, despite having tattoos, mohawk, and dark attire. Life is about learning :)

andrea lynne rose said...

This is so cute! It's like a modern version of a very colonial dress!

http://madnessanmusings.blogspot.com/

Rebecca, The Clothes Horse said...

@kittenhood, I think it's true that people won't always take you seriously at first, but once you open your mouth you should be able to set them straight. And if they don't listen to what you're saying b/c of what you're wearing, then they're usually not worth being around--I mean any time someone can't listen to others it's their issue.

Girl about town.... said...

Under no circumstances can you stop dressing so beautifully! I know what you mean, its the age old tale of judgement; If it isn't our body language or behaviour, then its our clothes. Goth's are supposed to be evil and depressive, but yet some of the nicest hilarious people I know!

Just know that you look wonderful. Don't let others opinions even enter you head! :)

Happy New Year!

Girl about Town XxX

laetitiasweeneyrose said...

I just love this kind of tights. ;) You look great. :)
laetitiasweeneyrose.wordpress.com

steffy said...

I don't really think of the way you dress as "twee"... I think you dress in a style that suits you. It wouldn't suit me at all, but I follow your blog because I love to see it and the way it looks on you. Sometimes you have pieces and accessories that I love and it's inspiring to me.

Fashion trends and backlash... pshaw. I think we should all just wear what makes us feel good.

Magpies at Sunrise said...

I really like you!

Rebecca, The Clothes Horse said...

@steffy, I agree, I don't think I'm twee either (altho I do have moments), but like I said in the post, this isn't about me or a comment I received; it's just a post on how twee isn't bad. :)

Maria Elyse said...

I was reading the Oprah magazine, I think the issue was from Oct./Nov., and in the fashion section they were showing photos of runway styles and how to turn those runway fashion "don'ts" into fashion "do's". One of the photos was a runway model (I wish I could remember what designer!) in a darling shift dress that reminded me of a 10 year old girl in the 30's, with pretty white lace tights and some lovely oxford heels. The magazine's caption by the photo was, "Stop insisting on dressing like a little girl. People want to see you looking like a woman." Who's to decide what's womanly? Or that dressing like a little girl is bad? Because I surely don't plan on stopping dressing like I did when I was 5 anytime soon. It frustrates me that people use "twee" in such a derogatory way about style, when in actuality that sort of style is a really beautiful thing.

xo
Maria Elyse
www.uneasyimpressions.blogspot.com

Fashion Inciter said...

Cute dress! Blue looks so amazing on you. I'm not sure how I like that ruffle tugging at the hem. But overall it's a great outfit!

Shelby said...

i completely agree with you!

boyishchic said...

Great shoes & a gorgeous blue for the dress!
xx. Jillian

London said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
young dumb love said...

love these shots. great job! also, great statement :)
-london camille

Ashley said...

What a lovely dress and outfit! And I know what you mean. Quite frankly, we as women can hardly ever win, and trying to say that how we dress means we are tacitly agreeing to being treated like a certain way is all part of the "she's asking for it" mentality - and we all know what that mentality can lead to, certainly at worst, but even at best it's simply another way of trying to control women and keep them down.

Anyway! Off my soapbox. :) I just obviously have a lot to say about this issue! At any rate, keep on keepin' on, both with the pretty packaging AND the sarcastic tongue!

Sistinas said...

I totally get what you mean, I usually dress sweet and wear lolita clothes (Japanese fashion), I wear lots of soft colours and people tend to think I'm a child or immature because of that, but I'm a perfectly normal housewife and mother.

I love this dress, it's beautiful!

Bad Taste Toast said...

Wow this dress is stunning! And the coat and tights look so so fab with it!

Jo said...

I think dressing like a doll is the most wonderful thing ever <3 And I completely agree - it is just how people like to dress!


x
Lost in the Haze: Fashion Blog

Muffin Top Vintage said...

I must say that I can really identify with this post. I am a HR Advisor which is a very high profile business role.

People always believe that I am 'fluffy' because I don't fit the "HR" perception of a hard ass.

I am clean, tidy and my shoes are always polished. Why a bow in my hair or a pretty dress make me not as good at my job than if I wore a suit I'll never know??

I am approachable, managers find me really easy to work with and we always get the best result for the business so clothes don't do the job the person does.

Thank you for reminding me of that :)
Katrina x

AlyssaChay said...

I love what you said. I have the problem of people thinking that my baby face reflect on my intelligence where that is not true at all. And I do have quite a sarcastic tongue. :)

Isabella said...

I think you look your age, smart and put-together, with a sense of art and fun.

I think some people make the mistake of masking who they are with clothes that are more like costumes (twee or otherwise), but your style seems to reflect a genuine, multifaceted personality.

I've gotten the "50s housewife" accusation before, and been offended by it. I think it's worth examining why I dress the way I do, but in the end I realize that it's about ignoring the stereotype and developing an aesthetic that I love, rather than subconsciously adhering to antiquated societal norms.

Emma Dear said...

Absolutely love your new hair! It suits you so well and makes you look so chic! It's darling!

BellaRose said...

So true! When I go to work in a suit, everyone takes me seriously, and if I turn up at the bar in a suit later people assume I'm an adult. If I wear a flowery dress I get asked for ID (like a teenager) and no one takes me seriously. But pretty dresses are so pretty...

This is one of my favourite dresses of yours as well :D

Bella

aka www.divine-decadence-darling.blogspot.com

The Braided Bandit said...

So very true!

Daisy said...

Perfectly said, I agree with you. People judge buy the cover as opposed to waiting to see what someone is like. I get told I look so young all the time and it makes me question what I wear as I don't think it helps. But I like the clothes I wear, I enjoy wearing a peter pan collar and if I want to place a bow in my hair then I will. But will all this restrict where I get career wise ! I hope not.

Santina said...

I appreciate you sharing your thoughts. Assumptions made on appearance baffle me, and I totally understand how you feel. I was often not taken seriously in my previous jobs in IT because of the way I was dressed or the color of my hair. At first I thought it might be about women in the workplace, but my boyfriend, who has dreads, definitely deals with the same crap (if not even more crap)! Luckily for me, I found my way into a company where I'm surrounded by pretty, well-dressed technical girls. Who knew there were so many of us? :)

Winnie said...

There are so many blogs out there, all documenting different types of personal style and I can always relate to your blog. You have the same love for sweet dresses and your thoughts have crossed my mind too. I have several dresses that are quite cute and child-like but I still wear them despite now being 25! It's definitely important not to judge a book by it's cover AND since I've had the pleasure of meeting up with you in the past, I have to say you are one of the smartest and loveliest bloggers I've ever met!

WearAbouts said...

those shoes ROCK! I love your style! you are so clever and smart, I love reading your words as much as seeing your looks :)
Rory
www.WearAboutsBlog.com

AnnaBananaCupcake said...

Stereotypes are something everyone has to battle with at some point or another. Fashion is an easy way for people to judge one another without getting to know the true person. Not sure if that will ever change! But it's nice to know that lady looking as adorable as you do still is able to eloquently express herself. Hopefully it will open someone's eyes. Great look!!
XOXO

Catherine said...

as a bow-wearing, peterpan collar-loving lady, i agree with you 100%! i'm glad you said this; I think it's something everyone needs to read. judging someone solely based on the silhouettes they prefer is ignoring all of the other facets of their personality that are often lost on the internet, etc. and if some people think twee is bad, I can't imagine trying to explain Lolita to them (another style I love, even if I don't dress that way)!

and, by the way, you look lovely here!

My Hideaway said...

Agreed. It's the equivalent of assuming that because someone is dressed modestly or conservatively, they must also be conservative in politics or be ultra religious, when maybe they just prefer to keep the lady parts covered for no other reason than personal taste; and the opposite is obviously true also, if someone likes to show off their attributes, people assume they aren't conservative in other aspects of life. It's all ridiculous. Clothes are just clothes.

ftashion said...

Love your dress and tights! Well many people always view others skin deep (or clothes deep). :)

Ash
ftashion

MintJulep said...

Rebecca, I totally get what you said, though I dind't have the idea that twee was so looked down upon. In my country you don't have to wear twee to be frowned upon or not taken seriously, or be labeled as shallow. If one is into fashion, into clothes, into wearing heels and make up and taking care of one's looks, here one gets labeled as shallow minded, uninteligent, unworthy. It used to hurt me a lot, being labeled that way, but with the years - I am now 39 - I've come to realise that people who feel insecure in the presence of other people will always find a way of putting down that one individual they find as left them feeling insecure...

Polly Bland said...

I totally agree with you. I also love the fact that you're wearing those 1940's style stocking tights. :)

love, polly

Chloe Jacqueline said...

You look gorgeous! Your dress and tights are lovely! It is sad how you get judged on what is on your body huh? So much for what is actually is in your head! However, I find you highly intellectual, but I take the time to read what you write!

MarieBayArea said...

hot tights. beautiful dress. i like the longer length.

Elizabeth said...

I agree. Sometimes I feel a little awkward wearing dresses that were made for grown women that look like little girls could wear them.

But, this isn't the 1950's anymore and women don't need to rely on looking like young innocent's to attract the world around them. So, I guess now there is a sense of empowerment with wearing typically sweet, girly styles.