On Beautification

I've recently received a few comments telling me that I was more attractive with red hair. Similarly, when I cut my hair off a couple of years ago I was told I was more attractive with the longer hair (someone even wrote a blog post about it, it was weird). This isn't a complaint post and I don't need any positive reinforcement on my hair, but rather a gentle reminder that myself and many women out there don't actually change their hair or pick their clothes in order to be more attractive (to anyone). Beauty is subjective anyway and some people will prefer me with long hair and others with short and my boyfriend is a big fan of the blue--in the end those opinions are irrelevant, what matters is how I like my hair. Crazy thought I know.
But even that is an aside from the point which is: I didn't dye my hair to be pretty. When I look in the mirror in the morning it's not like I see my hair and go "oh yes +10 cuteness points for me!" Rather it's more like, "yay, one of my favorite colors is on my head, I get to carry this around with me all day long." Having things I like around me is the goal: I want my bedroom filled with my favorite novels, I want to live around people I love, I want my kitchen filled with delicious food, and I want to wear clothes that I like because of they way they look on their own--some color or pattern that appeals to me. There are a myriad of reasons I choose which clothes to wear and style my hair and it has nothing to do with general curb appeal. It's strange that an argument still needs to be made that women might not alter their appearance in order to look pretty.
This is hardly a new or revolutionary thought. Betsey Johnson is quoted for having said, "if women dressed for men they'd walk around naked at all times." Seems about accurate. If I was dressing to impress other girls it seems like my friends and I would have more similar style, instead we're fairly diverse. In fact, my biggest advice on figuring out personal style is to stop asking, "does this look good on me" to anyone. You can still want to look good and pretty, but try to figure out what you think looks pretty rather than your older sister, best friend, etc. When you do like something and feel good in it, you don't need any positive reinforcement--you're secure in your own opinion. For example my skirt today: I don't know if it does anything for my figure or I look really cute in it; what I do know is that it reminds me of vintage couches, The Sound of Music, and Ernst Haeckel prints. I'm not really concerned if my boyfriend or the random people I pass on the street like it or me in it--I like it. It doesn't have to make me pretty.

Outfit details:
dress worn as top, old
Zara skirt
Topshop sandals (old, similar here)
Rebecca Minkoff backpack (similar here)


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